The Faith of a Child

Anyone who knows my now 12 year old son, knows that he isn't the most optimistic person. In fact he usually is pretty negative about most things and complains a lot. Typical soon to be teenager. But he said something to me the other day that not only changed my mind on how he thinks about things, it also strengthen my faith.

A few weeks ago, my son was riding with me to lunch when we were rear ended at a stop sign. It was an extremely minor accident. We were at a stop and the other driver was watching the traffic and thought I had already pull onto the main road when he proceeded forward. There was minimal damage, just a plastic bumper moved out of place (my husband bumped it back with no problem), and maybe a scratch. There was no hard jolt and no injuries. Once I was sure that my son and I were alright, I spoke to the other driver  and agreed that filing an accident report would be too time consuming. I got all of his information just in case and we left. He and his wife were extremely nice and he seemed a bit embarrassed by the whole thing, taking full responsiblity.

As we proceeded to our destination my son said to me, "Mom, maybe that happened because God saw something worse up ahead and needed us to wait".  I was taken back with his statement, he doesn't usually see the bright side of things.  This was a moment, a moment when I realized that he was paying attention, a moment that I realized just how strong the faith of a child can be.

Jesus said that in order to enter the Kingdom of Heaven we need to become like little children.  We need to have their faith.  We need to have that total dependence on God and His will.  We need to know that God is with us and will protect us always.

This moment made me proud, it made me feel that with all that I do wrong, that I  am actually doing something right.

Not only did God use my son to help strengthen my walk in faith, He used my son that through his eyes I could see.

Matthew 18:2-6(NKJV)

2 Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, 3 and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.

Another Door Opens

"God is good all the time----All the time God is good".

 Author: Unknown 

Finding a new school for our kids was a big issue for us this year. We looked at so many schools and programs, and nothing seemed to strike us as the "this one's it". We researched, went on interviews, made numerous phone calls. All of our options sounded good, they just didn't feel right. I knew God would provide, I just got impatient not knowing.

We went on an interview at this one school, everything seemed great, they said everything we wanted to hear. Everything looked perfect, but there was just that feeling in my gut that my kids are just not supposed to be here. My husband felt the same as me. It was hard for me because this certain place just seemed like the best choice out of all of our options. It had a good location, it was well established, nice teachers. But I just couldn't shake the feeling, as if Someone else was leading me in a different direction. But what direction?? This was the only option that made sense, how could it be wrong? 

We even paid the registration fees for the kids, even with doubt in our mind. We didn't see any other option.

The day after we paid the registration fee, our pastors wife spoke to my husband and said that she would be interested in and willing to start a little homeschool program in our church. It was that moment that I knew why nothing seemed to be the right place. My husband called the other school, told them our situation and they gladly gave us our money back. We were short on time but God worked out all of the details.

My kids started school this year at our church. There are only three kids, but we know that it will stay open as long as God wants it there. The beginning has been challenging and the road a bit bumpy, but we keep pressing on. We are hoping that this is the start of something bigger, because I know that God always provides. And should it only last this year, I know that God just something better in mind.

This journey has been such a walk in faith, because even though I said that I put it in God's hands, I was just too impatient to really see.

Revelation 3:8 (NKJV)

8 “I know your works. See, I have set before you an open door, and no one can shut it;[a] for you have a little strength, have kept My word, and have not denied My name.

A Messy House

My husband sent me this picture at work.  I didn't want to know.  Apparently my son was cleaning his room and so his junk ended up in the living room. The house was already a mess so this was something else I didn't want to deal with.  

When I got home from work, I was just too tired to even mess with the mess.  Clothes and toys everywhere, kitchen was a disaster.  I felt defeated and overwhelmed.

As I sat in my chair looking around I realized something that I was just too busy to pay attention to. 

I thanked God for my messy house. I am grateful for the piles laundry, dirty dishes and all the toys spread about.  So many times I get so frustrated that I can't keep up.  But as I look around I just realize how blessed I am.  The clothes on our back. The food in fridge and in our bellies.  The toys that one day won't be here for me to complain about.

I praise God for my messy house.  Because through all chaos I can see the abundance of his blessings.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

King James Version (KJV)

18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

Another Door Closes

This past Friday my little one graduated kindergarten.  Such a bittersweet moment for me.  The saddest part is that the school that she has been attending for the past 2 and a half years will be closing.

It was an amazing school that both she and her older brother attended.  It was big enough for her but small enough for him.  It was five minutes from my house, I dropped them off on my way to work without having to go out of my way.  The staff was beyond phenomenal.  It was growing and thriving. It was structured. It was perfect.

So when we got the news this past January that it was closing I was dumbfounded.

I thought this was it, that we had found the perfect school for our children.  They would have stayed there till college.  It was a blessing.  I knew with my whole heart that this is where God wanted them to be. I just couldn't understand.  I was sad, frustrated and angry.  Why were we doing this again?  Then I came to the realization that God has never led me astray, so why should I worry.

Accepting this was difficult, but God always has a plan.  My children are just not meant to be there anymore. God always takes care of His own, and this circumstance is no exception.  I just have to have faith.  God will open another door for all of us, just sometimes I get a little impatient.

Although the future is uncertain, I have a sense of peace.  Knowing that God has a plan and excited to see what He has in store for us.

This is such a huge walk in faith, cause of right now I just cannot see.

Philippians 4:6-7

New Living Translation (NLT)

6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

Convicted

Disclaimer:  The following post is of my own personal conviction.  I feel that God convicts us of the things we struggle with the most and for everyone it is different.  This post in no way judges anyone who chooses to drink.  This was my battle and mine alone.

I stopped drinking almost 9 years ago.  I never considered myself an alcoholic but I was a social drinker and back then I was very social.  Mostly on weekends I would drink and go out.  My problem was I would drink and get really drunk and the next day pay the price.  But I continued to do it regardless. I didn't see any problem with it and it wasn't anything I was planning on stopping anytime soon.

When my son was really small I used to go out a lot.  I was a stay at home mom at the time and in the evenings when my husband would get home, I would go out with my friends.  I remember doing it quite frequently sometimes numerous times in one week.  This went on for a few months.  Looking back I can't believe that I actually did that, I was out of control.  But I am not the same person I was back then either.

I had finally gotten to a point where I was slowly making progress with my faith.  Feeling that things had to change but not really knowing how to change things.  I knew that I needed to change, but I just didn't have the courage to do it.

One night we were at some friends house and my son was with us.  I was drinking and having a good time.  I remember when I was tending to my son, he was probably a year and a half at the time.  I remember looking at him, looking at me and realizing that I never wanted him to see me like that again.  I had to stop, I could no longer continue like that. Something that I thought would be so hard to give up was now no longer difficult.  It wasn't much longer after that night that I completely quit drinking for good.

God used my son to convict me on something knowing that I could only truly see the damage I was doing to myself by looking through my sons eyes.  Watching him looking back at me, in a dizzy drunken haze a moment of clarity, and a burden placed on my heart.  I was convicted and there was no turning back now.  It was done and I knew what I had to do.  I hadn't even fully given my life over to God at that point.  I was still straddling the fence.  But God knew the person I so longed to be and little by little he was showing me the way.

I didn't like who I was when I was drinking, it wasn't me.  I just never thought I could give it up.  What would people think about me?  Would they think I was being self-righteous?  Would they think I was judging them?  At first I didn't tell anyone, then after awhile people kind of figured it out.  Those who really mattered didn't mind at all.  These days it is no problem for me to tell anyone no thank you.  I gave that up long ago. Of course sometimes I get silly looks, like whats the problem.  But I tend to brush it off and not go into detail.  It is just something that is no longer a part of my life and I don't even have any urge to go back.

This was my personal conviction for my own personal battle between who I was and who I wanted to be.  This was something I just had to walk by faith, because at that time it was a little too hazy to see.

Psalm 37:4

King James Version (KJV)

⁴ Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

A Snoodle's Tale

With two kids around, I have plenty of Veggie Tales to watch.  I absolutely love these little cartoons.  My absolute favorite of all the Veggie Tales is "A Snoodles Tale".

To tell you the truth almost every time I watch it, it gives me goose bumps and brings tears to my eyes.  It is so sweet and such a reminder of our self worth and just how much we matter.  That we were created for a purpose and once we realize that we will soar.

Amazing how a cute little 30 minute cartoon can make such an impact on not just my little ones but me also.

I urge you to check them out sometime, even if you don't have little ones around the house, you might just learn something about yourself.

God The Provider

A few weeks ago we again went to family.  This year I was a little leery about going.  I really wanted to go, actually I really needed the break from everything that was going on around me.  Here lately I haven't been feeling 100%.  I think I am just exhausted mentally, physically and spiritually.

For the past few months I have been trying my best to avoid gluten.  I am pretty sure that I have a sensitivity to it.  The problem is at camp the majority of the meals that they make there contain gluten.  Knowing how much I needed this break, I started preparing quick meals to take along.  I knew that there was a store not to far away from where we would be staying in case I needed to restock.  I just thought it was best to plan ahead.

When we arrived at evening worship I realized that one of my favorite speakers, my brother from another mother was our  camp Pastor for the week.  One of his topics for the week was God the Provider.  I was amazed at how each and every message he spoke was exactly what I needed to hear.

Our first morning at camp, I brought along with me my gluten-free breakfast items to the cafeteria.  One meal down and everything went smoothly.  I went back to the cabin the get ready for the day of activities.  My husband came in a little later, and that is when I realized just what kind of week God had in store for me.

It just so happened that one of the staff at camp also was on a gluten restricted diet.  The kitchen would make her a "special" gluten free version of whatever they were making.  Now that they knew that I also was on the same diet they would make sure the make enough for me too.

Needless to say, I spent the entire week  being spiritually, mentally and physically fed.  We only had to go to town once to fill the car up with gas.  I was amazed at how God had provided, and I didn't even ask.

Sometimes we make the mistake of minimizing the power of God.  God knows what we need before we know what we need.  And he always provides  even when we don't ask.

I had an amazing week at camp, in fact I didn't want to leave.  It was so beautiful, the weather was perfect and the one on one time with my family was priceless.  God knew how badly  I needed this break and He made sure it was perfect.

I love these moments when I don't even realize that I am walking by faith, because it is these times that I can actually see.

Matthew 6:31-33

King James Version (KJV)

³¹ Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
³² (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.
³³ But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.